My Night Memory

Before going to bed last night I made a note to myself. Here it is:

My memory is much better at night. I talked with Brian about religion.

Apparently, at night my memory is better. I guess that means I can probably remember more stuff when I'm tired, or something. Ah, irony. Also the second sentence is pretty self-explanitory.

Anyway, this was an experiment to see if writing stuff down jogged my memories. It didn't, but there is a thing similar to déjà vu or something, like when you know something, but you can't find it. Next time I stay up late, I'll make a point of writing stuff down. Also, last night we went to an asylum.

People are loud

Just in general. People should be quieter.

Martial art kind of stuff

I was doing Godai Ninpo Ninjutsu last year, but I found out recently that it is not actually very good. However there is a different Ninjutsu group called Bujinkan Budo Taijutsu. It costs about a quarter the price, meets three times a week instead of once, and is better apparently. So um, now I am doing Bujinkan. I can actually only make it once a week anyway, but it is still $100 per semester. So, um, I am doing it.

French

Want to know what French word sucks for a native English speaker to say? Réfrigérateur. It looks harmless, but keep in mind that a French "r" is roughly equivalent to a Yiddish "ch". So a better way to write it might be Chéfchigéchateuch. I hate this word.

Markers.

There is rampant marker theft going on in my hall. Most of the whiteboards at this point do not have markers (in fact, one of these has "Mark my words, the next marker will be POISONED" written on it). I, along with a couple others, have purchased a new marker and duct-taped it to the door. This solved the problem for a while, but now, guess what. There are no caps on our markers. WHAT. WHY WOULD A PERSON DO THIS. Seriously, markers could be anything, but marker caps? That is just saying "hey I am being an asshole for no reason."

Dear thief. Fuck you. You are the kind of person who should not exist. Nobody likes you, and all your friends say bad things about you when you are not around. In fact, everybody hates you. Suicide is the only way out. Remember—down the block twice, and then cross the street at your elbow. (In case you are an idiot, I am telling you to drag a razor down your arm twice, and then across. It is pretty basic information, and I normally would not clarify, but I want to make sure you understand.) Your pal, Matt.

Ch'uis très occupé maintenant.

For serious. I am dang busy right now. But I love it. It's really cool to be busy when it is because you have a lot to do and not because you have a lot to do that you should have done a week ago. C'est très cool!

An observation: I've been noticing that most of the students I see here think of themselves as high school students. They seem to think that they are in classes because they have to be, and that they are studying because they have to. This is not the case. If you hate all your classes, you should maybe think about why you took them. If you took it to fulfil a requirement, at least remember that you are paying something like $65 per hour of class, so you may as well try to find a way to enjoy it. Even if the only way is that it is a step towards graduating.

I think the development of the undecided major is in part to blame. People go in with the intention of continuing their high school experience and to take a diverse amount of interesting classes. Problem is, this is not what a university is for. Now that I actually have an idea of what I want to do "when I grow up," I can look at each of my classes and think to myself, "this class will help me with this, and that class will really help me to do this." This way, I am more like a man with goals, who is seeking the help of a university.

I don't really see many people like me in that respect. I imagine that about half the students here are here because "college is what comes after high school." I mean, that's why I went a year ago, and look where it got me. Well, it got me into a monastery, which was admittedly pretty awesome. But I should have gone to the monastery from the start, because I didn't have any idea what I wanted to do.

I dunno. I used to think of the "know your life plan" approach as boring and old-fashioned, but now that I'm taking it, I can really see its advantages. Plus, there are way too many 17-year-olds in college right now. But seriously, having a lifetime goal is the shit. I am basically inspired to do all my work all the time. Even if the work is boring, I can see my end goal, and see that it is attainable if I do the boring work, and then for that reason the work becomes interesting.

Guys, totally figure out what you want to do with your life. Your life will become completely awesome. I mean, even if what you want to do is ridiculous, don't let that be a reason to quell it. If it's what you want to do, then there ain't no one who can tell you to stop wanting to do it.

Plus you will seriously enjoy every aspect of life. I mean, my whole thing even gives me a reason to go out of my way to make a lot of friends. It's fucking awesome! Anyway I have one thousand homeworks and not a lot of time. Don't expect many updates for a while. Then again, things might let up a little. We'll see.

Yeah no more Decemberists.

Sorry everybody. I don't like The Decemberists. Do not talk to me about the Decemberists because I do not care and I do not like them.

Today has been another damn good day. I like today.

Dangit

I cut my thumb while shaving.

The Decemberists

I like their music whenever the guy is not singing. When he starts singing, a part of me wants to turn off the music. I hope I just get used to it. I guess a lot of their music is about the lyrics. I don't really listen to music for the lyrics. I like music to sound good, and I start to notice the lyrics after I've listened to a song about 10 times. The only exception I can think of is Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life. Otherwise, listening to lyrics takes way too much effort for me to want to do it. And I don't really like The Decemberists. I mean, I'll try harder to like them, but that is my current feeling. I mostly HATE how the singer inserts the sound "ay" instead of "ee" (keepayng instead of keeping, speakayng instead of speaking). That's really all I hear when I listen to it right now.

Also, while coming back to my room, I noticed a guy leaving a dorm room wearing only a towel. This is of course a common site, as guys do need to get to the shower. What I didn't realise until I was in my room was that he was coming out of a room in Cooley House, which is reserved for WISE (Women In Science & Engineering). There are no guys in WISE.

Not important or anything. I just noticed it and it made me laugh to myself, so I thought it'd be worth typing. Like the time the Ninja Hunters knocked on a door and it was answered by an angry guy in a bathrobe who was definitely in the middle of sex when we got there.

Guess who has finished ALL THE WORK

Me! I am doing so much better this semester than last semester. I mean, the first week is hardly evidence to show anything, but my attitude and everything is exactly where it should be. But yeah, I just finished all the French work due tomorrow (which I started Friday, after receiving the assignment Thursday). There was actually a lot of French work. Yesterday I finished the math homework due Wednesday. Now I can enjoy today knowing that I have NO WORK AT ALL to do. I have not had this feeling since, um, well, I think there were a couple times in high school where I bothered to finish my work ahead of time and it felt like this. Dang. Today is going to be so great.

As for the broader perspective of my life, I am doing really well. I am making friends now, for example. It is not very hard to make friends. Actually it is really easy to make friends. It just takes some effort, and then you have to visit people and stuff, and not wait for them to initiate anything. I used to always leave it to other people to initiate stuff, and I would get all depressed when no one did, thinking that everyone must hate me. In truth, people basically are too lazy, or they barely know me, or they are doing the same thing I am doing. In each circumstance, initiating stuff is the answer.

This is pretty basic stuff, and I've probably known that, but I finally started doing it. Exciting time. Also, I've realised that while I cannot directly control my emotions, it is easy to indirectly control them. Exempli gratia, I get depressed. Instead of wallowing (more on this later), I figure out why I am depressed. Say it is because I don't think people care about me. I then go hang out with someone who definitely cares with me. Actually the solution to depression is usually hanging out with someone (for me anyway), but it is typically a pretty specific type of someone. When it comes to the point where I am depressed and don't want to think about it, I go for a run. For at least 15 minutes. This ALWAYS HELPS.

My dad used to say something like, "mix up your chemicals; don't add new ones." The idea is to promote running as a "bestitute" for drugs. I think there's something to that. When I run for 15 minutes, my mind feels clearer, and more open. It certainly doesn't remove such as depression, but it gives me a better angle on what's going on, and the will to solve the problem at hand.

Anyway, my room is clean, my work is done, my previously dirty clothing is being laundered, I have friends, and today I am going to celebrate my dad's birthday. For me, my life is at the highest point it's been at in years. And it's looking like it'll keep going up for a good while. Great!

Also, I am liking Inara George more and more. I like it more as background music than as active listening music, but I really like it a lot as background music. It is really good for doing homework without being distracting. I'm like, "daaaaang!"

I'm thinking a lot about the language I'm making right now. I wish I knew a linguist. Or hell, anybody who knows the basics of language and has the free time to help me with this.

A meditation on toilet seats

For the majority of my life, I have been in the "toilet seat AND cover both go down when you are done" camp. When there is no cover, I put down the seat. I feel this is a good habit. However, now that the dorm bathroom is actually a women's bathroom that says "MEN" on the door (basically meaning there are no urinals), guys all use normal toilets for everything. Now, I am beginning to appreciate the idea of leaving the seat up. If the seat is up, it signifies that there will be no urine on it if you have to take a dump. If it is down, then you just don't know. Now, when I need to unload the day's rations, I first see if any toilets have the seat up. It is much easier than entering the stall and inspecting the seat to make sure.

I mean, or you could just sit in a puddle of some dude's pee. It's up to you.

GOD my legs hurt

Ow!

I like sandwiches!

A good time

I am eating a sandwich while reading The Great Outdoor Fight.

Today is going to be great.

I am going to jam with Tom Goss in the afternoon maybe with a bunch of people. Also, starting at 9 or 10, I am going to hunt some ninja. I went to Acme Mercantile and bought new FUTURE GOGGLES and five tiny water pistols. Also a FUTURE GUN. We will probably be hunting ninjas, because, as Anneka said, it is our first time in months, and we want people to see us and think to themselves, "daaaaang."

I mentioned Ninja Hunting to Ewan, and he said he had been told about that during orientation. Someone from East Quad was talking about group opportunities, and they finished the list with "we even have ninja hunters," and a few people were apparently very impressed by this news. I hope we do not let them down and that instead we measure up to their golden standard of what a ninja hunter should be like.

Actually I just hope they join. Eventually, our ninja hunting group will be so huge that we will be too big for East Quad and will have to spread to South Quad and West Quad. Then we will begin leeching into Hill Campus, and finally North Campus. Then we will annex other colleges with our Ninja Hunting. It is going to be so great.

Is pretty great, to not be on facebook

One of the things I thought would be a problem is that I now cannot view the contact information of a lot of people I got in touch with over facebook. What I realise is that being facebook friends with someone does not make me any more "in touch" with them. It just gives me the secure feeling that I am. Being off facebook, I have to write down the contact information of people I actually WANT to be in touch with, and if anyone wants to know anything about me, they have to meet me. Also vice versa. I can't go read someone's profile and suddenly know everything about them anymore. I now have to go back to the old fashioned method of hanging out.

It is kinda weird though. It's like, I've been on facebook for a year and a half, and suddenly it's gone. This is something like what I would imagine it would be like to quit smoking. But probably to a much lesser degree. It's like, whoa, that is not a part of my life.

On the other hand, I feel really awesome. Kind of in the same way that indie-listeners probably feel awesome. Back when I first joined facebook, I was part of a small-ish group of people who were discovering a cool network of people. While I was on it, it evolved into a disgusting but glossed-over MySpace. The whole News Feed thing was what made me consider leaving, and then I was like "but that's a little extreme," but then I was like "well actually I've kinda been looking for an excuse for a while now. This is a good one."

So the newsfeed is the scapegoat (did you know that once a year, Jews blame all their sins on a goat? Shoshana told me this. It is apparently where the word "scapegoat" came from. Learning things like this is a cool thing to do) for why I left, but really I kinda stopped liking facebook around May or so. Maybe before then. It might have been before I left. Actually I still think they should have left the walls the way they used to be. When they changed the walls, I guess a seed was planted.

Anyway, leaving facebook does not count as a full blog post really. Other information about what I am doing: I met a girl named Angela yesterday, and it turns out I have known her for more than a year and a half, from an interfaith religious conference I went to those years ago. Also I moved her into her room, and somehow we both forgot that. This actually sounds like a much less weird revelation than it was at the time. At the time we were like "SHIIIIIIT." Also she has my umbrella. It's been a while since I've been separated from my brolly for this long. I want it back. Just kidding. I mean, I do want it back, but I don't want it so urgently that italics were necessary or anything.

She said that I should read Pride and Prejudice. I guess I should. But it goes on the bottom of my list, and considering that Gödel, Escher, Bach and House Of Leaves are both on the list above it, I probably won't get around to reading it for a good couple years, if I'm quick.

I'm listening to a lot of Звери today. I probably shouldn't like them as much as I do, but I do like them exactly that much, so fuck you.

Anyway I am going to go shopping for new Ninja-Hunting / Billionaires for Bush gear. Goodbye.

-Matt

facebook

The only things keeping me on facebook are my "Let's Unite the Planet" groups. Wait, I can set up a forum on the internet. That would make SO MUCH MORE SENSE. Facebook, goodbye.

THE DECADE OF THE BRAIN

Apparently this is how one could choose to refer to the 1990's. I don't really know whose idea this was. Anyway college is pretty cool and this is my ten minute break in between 5 hours of classes. I have class in 5 minutes, so bye.

Hahaha!

This is a somewhat good one.

A letter to a girl

This is a letter to a girl who definitely reads this blog.

Dear Girl: You will be pleased to know that I have finally thrown out the futon cover that I have had for more than one year. It has been replaced completely with a new futon cover, and I assure you that there is no way that anything displeasing could have already entered into this new cover. You can now feel safe and comfortable whenever you sit on my futon. Your pal, Matt.

I guess this is also a letter to anyone who went ninja hunting with me on a certain night when we decided to barge into a certain room to see a certain futon cover that had certain actions happening on it when we came in. You know who you are. Also the girl that this letter is to is Anneka.

For the rest of my post, I am going to talk about my life at this point.

After pausing for about 1 and a half minutes, I realise that I have a lot that happened, and not a lot to say about any of it. Thank you. -Matt