The dickens of a chuckle

The following (most recent) achewood comic has a number of elements of note:

http://achewood.com/index.php?date=07312006

It's the eye of the tiger, it's the cream of the fight, rising up to the challenge of our rival

Is so on the power mix.

Argh

When I am not on a computer I have several ideas of things that I should find on the internet, but I forget them when I am on a computer. I should write them down when I am not at a computer, but I only remember to do that when I am at the computer after forgetting the idea. You see the problem.

Post

For future reference, if I am not lying about something like my previous post, I will throw in an occasional "by the way I am being serious and not joking."

Anyway, my family reunion was a lot of fun, and I went white water rafting for the first time in my life. I fell out and it was cold, but then I got back in and I was still cold. I learned a new card game and a couple of drinking games. All in all, a good few days.

Incidentally, I am planning on maybe going to Toronto for a couple days or something. We'll see.

Tomorrow

I am leaving again. This time for good. I've had enough of America, and I am going to move to Toronto (I'll be living at the temple). I don't plan on coming back any time soon, if ever. I'll probably get on a computer at some point when I get there.

Bye.

Yesterday

I hung out with Simon and Kaitlin. AT THE SAME TIME. Just kidding. Different times (I was only kidding about the same time).

Peel peel peel

The skin on my shoulders is peeling! It's an exciting time.

Camera!

Heh, I guess it is kind of vain to make a post with only the purpose of placing a picture of yourself. But I am. I noticed a bunch of old pictures that never got removed from my camera. And I really like this picture of me. It was taken in the Toronto Botanical Garden on the day I left the monastery. I really like this picture, and I have no idea why.

WHAT AM I DOING RIGHT NOW

Not listening to the Eye of the Tiger. I am not listening to the Eye of the Tiger.

My Blog Entry For Today

I really want to write something here and I feel like there is something I should write about, but I have no idea what these somethings are. So I guess I'll settle for writing a couple of sentences, because there isn't much more to write about that I want to write about, and I can't think of a different subject that I want to write.

Back in general

I am back from Watervale. I read 7 books and spent most of every day wandering around with or without a camera (usually without). I decided that I am going to get my own thing to develop film in, but that is a problem because I don't know what it's called. Photographers! What is it called! It's that black can thing with a spool that holds the film so that I can put chemicals in it. I need help figuring this out.

Right now I am in a really anti-social mood, and have been for some time now. In fact, I've been in varying degrees of anti-social for the past couple months. I kind of wonder if it is just a long-ish phase, or if I just don't really like people. Anyway, I decided that it's ridiculous and I am going to start doing some serious hanging out. You heard me.

I decided that I am going to make some mood mixes. Right now what I mean by that is mood mix, because I've only thought of one mood that I want to make a mix for. I am putting together my Power! Mix. The idea is that when you listen to it, every song makes you feel like you are awesome and that you can do anything. So far, it has four songs, and only one of them is the Final Countdown (the other three are by the go team). I have high expectations for this project.

Also while I was gone I had a bunch of realisations about, uh, everything I guess. Mostly spiritual or psychological stuff, so I'll spare you most of it. But my favourite one was about honesty and compassion.

I was thinking about how so many people favour being nice to being honest. So if I have a booger hanging out of my nose at a nice dinner party, is anybody about to tell me? No of course not. A smaller number of people hate that, and will then be honest always. I used to look at this as an "I guess that's the best thing". Until I realised that it isn't just about honesty, and it's also about compassion. See, the majority of people tend toward dishonest compassion, while those who rebel against that are honest, but without compassion. Thing is, you can actually do both, and pretty easily as long as you're mindful of it. And picking one or the other is bad no matter what. Dishonest compassion makes you a bumbling fool, while honesty without compassion becomes cruelty.

Night.
-Matt

Back on the 22nd

Well I'm leaving for Watervale. I don't really want to go. Actually, I really just don't want to go. But I'm going. Then right after I'm at a family reunion until August. See you in August.

AAAAA

I CAN'T DO IT

NEVER POSTING AGAIN

Let's see how long I can do this

Snakes on a Plane

It's real. I saw it advertised at a movie theatre. For a while I just assumed it was a fake movie. I mean, the only evidence I saw of it was a bunch of fake trailers made for it on the internet, and the IMDb, which is also on the internet (I don't trust the internet for reliable information, ever, by the way). But I saw a movie poster, and it said it was coming out on the 18th of August. Dang. August is going to be kickass. Ditty Bops on the 17th, Snakes on a Plane on the 18th. I'm like, "daaaaang!"

Summer 용맹정진 2006

Yeah I'm just showing off putting Korean in the title. It transliterates to "Yongmaeng Chōngjin" (pronounced kinda like "youngman junction" — I used to think that was how it was spelled when people talked about it), and it means "Ferocious Effort." In Korean monasteries, for the 7 or 9 days before Buddha's Enlightenment Day (usually in January), they will hold a Yongmaeng Chōngjin. This means they meditate all day, and then all night, and then repeat, until Buddha's birthday arrive (they don't go to sleep). Some monasteries hold Yongmaeng Chōngjins at other times of year as well, but that is the time that all of them do it.

I did not do that. In the west, we have a much less hardcore version. Here is our schedule:

5:00 - Wake up / cold rub-down and stretching
6:00 - 108 prostrations, then the first meditation period
8:30 - Breakfast
9:00 - Cleaning practise
10:00 - Rest
10:30 - Second meditation period
1:00 - Lunch
1:30 - Rest
2:30 - Work practise
6:00 - Optional snack
7:00 - Third meditation period
10:00 - "Bed time"
11:00 - Candles off on the alter

Okay, uh. Cold rub-downs are pretty-much what they sound like. You stand there naked in a small bathroom with about 15 other naked people and buckets full of cold water. You put a towel in a bucket, and rub yourself vigourously. You do your whole body 2 or 3 times (takes 15-20 minutes). It is definitely a way to wake up.

Meditation periods consist of a half-hour sitting meditation, a 10-minute break, a half-hour sitting meditation (with interviews), a half-hour walking meditation, and a half-hour sitting meditation (continuing interviews). The third meditation period has a fourth half-hour sitting.

Work Practise: I will now reveal the story behind yesterday's post. Yesterday's post is a lie. I did not come across any stinging nettles. I was upgraded to harvesting this weird tree that had it's trunk and all its branches covered in thorns that were bigger than my thumb. I'm like, "daaaaang!" My mom said she thinks it was called buckthorn. To me that sounds too innocent. I think it was called Murderthorn: The thorn plant that murders.

It was definitely an experience. I'd go into more detail about things that happened, but they're all meditation-related, and so I won't bore you.

Oh wait. There was one thing that happened. See, when we did walking meditation, we would go outside and jog in a line. Then we'd walk, eventually walk inside, and then walk really really really slow. While we were jogging on Saturday and Sunday, we were all shouting. The retreat is silent, so I guess that is to get all the built-up noise out of our systems. It's quite a spectacle—35 or so Buddhists running in a line shouting and screaming (not words, just sounds). Sometimes crowds would gather to watch, take pictures, or heckle us. But one guy liked it so much that he decided to join us. And then he went inside with us. And sat with us. And went up for an interview. It was during the interview that Sunim discovered that he was not from some other temple, and in fact just wandered it. Apparently he even signed a release form (retreaters sign a form that releases the temple's liability for things like being stabbed repeatedly by ridiculous thorns).

Well, this guy was actually in line next to me for interviews. Not behind me, or in front of me, like he was supposed to be. And he kept nudging me and trying to ask which of us should go first. It was pretty irritating, and I just ignored him until he said "okay you go first." I assumed he had just arrived from Chicago or Mexico. After my interview, I never saw him again. I was getting really worried that I had hallucinated him, and was all "what is this retreat doing to my head!" But then Sunim mentioned the guy when the retreat was over, and I was like "oh good I'm not crazy."

Otherwise, I have some ideas for my web site, and in the next month, they should happen.

OH SHIT STINGING NETTLES (part 3)

OHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!

Toronto

First off, in case I've been unclear, I'm going to a Buddhist retreat in Toronto until Tuesday. That is where I am. Also, some people seem to think I had a horrible time there. I didn't. I loved it there. It was really hard, but that is a very different thing. Bye

DID YOU KNOW! (part 4)

I talked to a man I know (named Fong) who is a sleep expert. By expert I mean that he used to work for Pfizer on sleep medication and has also worked with Henry Ford Sleep Research. So he knows what he's talking about. Today is an educational post about sleep.

Sleep Cycles. It seems like most everyone I talk to knows how these work, but I didn't, and I don't know how much people are faking so they don't seem dumb. I'll explain it, and you can pretend you knew already (or if you knew, congratulations smarty-pants). When you sleep you sleep in several cycles. The first cycle consists of a lot of Deep Sleep, followed by a little REM Sleep. The next cycle has less Deep Sleep, and more REM Sleep. This continues, and the last cycle has a little Deep Sleep, followed by a lot of REM sleep. By the way, Deep Sleep is dreamless sleep that makes you feel rested and refreshed. REM (Rapid Eye Movement) Sleep is where your eyes are moving and you are dreaming. REM Sleep does not make you feel rested. REM Sleep, however, is very important for your ability to learn or remember things.

Anyway, you might be wondering, "How does my body know which cycle is my last cycle to do a little deep sleep and a lot of REM!" The answer is that it doesn't. There is some number of sleep cycles you are supposed to go through, and you will naturally wake up after the last one. If you wake up because of an alarm, or some other exterior happening, chances are you will be losing REM Sleep (think about it mathematically, that makes sense). In other words, you might feel perfectly rested, but you won't be performing your best as your memory and learning abilities will be hampered. Therefore, if you want to be at your best, it's important to get enough sleep.

You might be asking, "How much is enough sleep!" Well, it is different for everyone. But it is mostly known to the public that when you are little, you need a lot of sleep (infants can need 18 hours a day), and as you develop it gradually goes down. When you are an adult, it is 8 hours and 16 minutes, on average (it can be as little as 4 hours, can be as much as 10). Many people think that "adult" means when you stop growing, around 20 years old. However, "adult" actually means when your brain is no longer developing, at more like 35 years old. 20-year-olds typically need 9-10 hours of sleep per night. Now if you are 20 and you are thinking "bullshit I only get 7 and I'm great," then keep a couple things in mind. First off, everybody is different. You don't necessarily fall into the average. Secondly, if you lose REM Sleep, you don't feel more tired. So you might only be losing an insignificant amount of Deep Sleep, but a quite significant amount of REM Sleep.

Anyway to answer the question, "I don't know." I mean, you have to figure it out. What you should do is set a bed time that you will rigourously follow, and see when you wake up each morning. The ideal thing to be doing is going to bed at a time that you know will allow enough sleep, and not setting an alarm. By the way, this means that most college students don't get nearly enough sleep. Not that they don't feel rested, just that their learning abilities are severely hampered. … Yeah.

You might be wondering, "What if I sleep in on the weekends!" Well, this actually is healthy, and makes up for lost sleep during the week. That's right, it actually is. However, it's only healthy compared to not getting enough sleep ever. The healthiest thing is to always get enough sleep. But if you do sleep in on weekends, that does make up for it. Problem is, you're not getting enough REM Sleep during the week. Chances are that during the week is when you actually need it.

Ju prolly wonner, "What if ju take a nap!" Naps do not help. If you need to take a nap, you are not getting enough sleep. Full stop. I was really surprised to learn this. Basically, a typical 20-minute power nap will only be deep sleep, because it's just the beginning of the first cycle. So it feels very restful, but does you no good. I mean, naps aren't bad for you. They are a very nice way to rest or take a break. But they are not at all a substitute for actual sleep. I know, I heard this and I was like, "daaaaang."

I think that covers everything. You can ask a question, and if I know the answer, I will answer it.

Two (2) Things I forgot to write about that happened on the same day

A while ago I went to my cousin's graduation. I had a contest with my mom. "Find a black person." It ended in a draw, because none of the graduating students were black (although a couple looked like it but upon closer inspection they were just tanned). I later asked my cousin "what is up with the lack of black students" and he said "there are a bunch of black students in my class" and I said "why were they not there" and he was like "well it's not like they ever graduate." And I am like "daaaaang."

Also, while eating after the graduation, a couple of the males in my family decided that males were genetically better drivers than women. They expressed this argument and while a couple other males thoughtfully nodded their head, the rest of the males and all the females loudly shot them down and it soon turned into an exciting debate. As neither side had a lick of evidence, I grew bored and interrupted, asking loudly if anybody knew any good jokes (this is my default question that I ask if I can't think of an alternative quickly — it is usually a good question and it moves overall conversation in a direction I like). Immediately, my wonderful brother shouted "I do! Why can't Helen Keller Drive!" It was a beautiful moment. (In case you have not heard this joke, the punchline insists that Helen Keller cannot drive because she is a woman.)

The third, bonus entry is that the newest Super Mega comic is particularly excellent.

The fourth, super deluxe bonus entry is that I finally got a google calendar. If you want to see what I am doing with my life, you can easily click the convenient Google Link™ to the right (it has GOOGLE CALENDAR written on it, you should not miss it).