31 December, 2006
Math
Math basically manages to make me feel at peace with everything all the time. I was feeling all sorts of strongly about religion, and now, well, I still feel exactly the same, but I'm not angry about it. Yeah, that's it. Math doesn't make me withdrawn, just emotionally unattached.
Yes, emotionally unattached exactly. Also, writing about it helped a lot. I guess that's why I have a blog. To be a friend that can listen to me even when all my other friends are elsewhere. Nice.
In an hour and a half or so, I'll be going to a party. Cool.
Also Nora is on a plane right now that is taking her back into the States. Cool.
And she gets back on Wednesday. Woo!
And I'll maybe hang out with Simon tonight. Emosewa.
Yes, emotionally unattached exactly. Also, writing about it helped a lot. I guess that's why I have a blog. To be a friend that can listen to me even when all my other friends are elsewhere. Nice.
In an hour and a half or so, I'll be going to a party. Cool.
Also Nora is on a plane right now that is taking her back into the States. Cool.
And she gets back on Wednesday. Woo!
And I'll maybe hang out with Simon tonight. Emosewa.
Warning, a lot of hate in this post
Over the past week I have been hating the hell out of religion in general. It mainly started when I read that Sam Harris book. At first I actually disagreed with him a lot, but I've been thinking about it a hella lot and I really do hate religions. I feel like they only cause harm.
A religion is just one more form of separation from other people. A way of feeling superior to the people who aren't in your club. We already have race, sexuality, age, gender, and language; we don't need yet another way of shouting at your neighbour, "I AM DIFFERENT FROM YOU." Not different, better.
Now, many people get a lot out of going to services for their religion or whatever. Hell, I went to Catholic mass yesterday and got a lot out of it. But now that I'm not brainwashed by the church I can see the difference between getting a lot out of the religion, and getting a lot of comfort from familiarity. Of course I got a lot out of it. I grew up with Christianity. It's nostalgic.
Even in Buddhism, there are different sects. Now, they all pride themselves in not judging, but judgement is a natural human reaction to anything. This is basic survival. So when a Japanese monk comes to a Korean temple, all the things he notices are the ways they do things differently. Grey robes instead of black. Only one hwadu instead of all the koans. Et cetera. I recall a Japanese monk saying exactly this. He went on to talk about how he realised he was focusing on all the wrong things, and that really we had way more in common than different. That is wisdom.
Religions encourage people to judge people of other religions. That is my first problem with religions. My second problem is that they encourage people to think that wonderful happenings must have been caused by a god or higher being.
When it rains for two months, it is because of the way the atmosphere is. When a poor man gets a job, climbs the ladder, and becomes rich, it is because he willed it to be so. Why can't we accept that humans are very wonderful on their own? Why should either event be caused by a god? Both are very possible, however unlikely. When a tsunami kills thousands of people on Christmas Eve, what makes that have anything to do with god? It doesn't. Yet many people felt righteous enough to say it was God punishing the non-believers. I have nothing but hatred for righteous people of any kind. Fuck them.
Religions do not make people better. I have no religion, and I am (stepping away from modesty for a moment) a hella good person. By the way, for those of you who are saying "I thought you were Buddhist," I stopped being Buddhist months ago. I go to the temple because I think meditation is wonderful, as are all the things we do at the temple. I think the teachings of Buddhism are right on. But that doesn't make me a Buddhist. It doesn't because I doubt the teachings and judge them. I decide whether or not I like a teaching. That is using my own moral compass, and not that of a religion. I affiliate myself most with Buddhism because I rarely (not never, though) find a teaching that I find unbeneficial. Therefore, I am not completely accepting the teachings of Buddhism, and am putting myself outside of the religion to judge it.
I believe the same to be true of anyone who does not follow their entire religion. If you are one of those people, please think about it. Are you actually getting positive things out of your faith, or are you actually just using your own considerable knowledge and wisdom to pick and choose? Are you getting anything positive out of services, or are they just comforting because they are familiar? Please give it some honest, open-minded thought. If I'm wrong, tell me. But be prepared for an argument, and be prepared to tell me exactly what you do get out of it.
Religions only cause harm. The good parts of religion are (depending on the religion) the teachings and practises. But stay away from beliefs, because that leads to righteousness. How else can you be when you have absolutely no evidence to support your claim of there being a god. Yes, I can't prove that there is no god, but I don't have the burden of proof here. I don't believe in anything that hasn't been already proven. Not out of ease, but out of common sense. Think about it. Why should there be a god? Because you like the idea of some all-powerful being controlling everything? That idea makes you more comfortable with the world? Okay, then whatever. At least recognise that there is not a shred of evidence to support your claim, and kindly keep your mouth shut about it. Just because you feel more at ease thinking that we are not capable of greatness on our own does not mean that other people do or even should agree.
I hate religion.
By the way, Nora, if you happen to read this, your note did not cause this. I was planning on making this post before I got it. It did make me feel a little more strongly about it, but I've been feeling like this a while.
Anyway, back to addressing all the readers, you can comment on this if you want, but I'd rather have a real conversation about it. Please do convince me I'm wrong. I don't like hating things.
A religion is just one more form of separation from other people. A way of feeling superior to the people who aren't in your club. We already have race, sexuality, age, gender, and language; we don't need yet another way of shouting at your neighbour, "I AM DIFFERENT FROM YOU." Not different, better.
Now, many people get a lot out of going to services for their religion or whatever. Hell, I went to Catholic mass yesterday and got a lot out of it. But now that I'm not brainwashed by the church I can see the difference between getting a lot out of the religion, and getting a lot of comfort from familiarity. Of course I got a lot out of it. I grew up with Christianity. It's nostalgic.
Even in Buddhism, there are different sects. Now, they all pride themselves in not judging, but judgement is a natural human reaction to anything. This is basic survival. So when a Japanese monk comes to a Korean temple, all the things he notices are the ways they do things differently. Grey robes instead of black. Only one hwadu instead of all the koans. Et cetera. I recall a Japanese monk saying exactly this. He went on to talk about how he realised he was focusing on all the wrong things, and that really we had way more in common than different. That is wisdom.
Religions encourage people to judge people of other religions. That is my first problem with religions. My second problem is that they encourage people to think that wonderful happenings must have been caused by a god or higher being.
When it rains for two months, it is because of the way the atmosphere is. When a poor man gets a job, climbs the ladder, and becomes rich, it is because he willed it to be so. Why can't we accept that humans are very wonderful on their own? Why should either event be caused by a god? Both are very possible, however unlikely. When a tsunami kills thousands of people on Christmas Eve, what makes that have anything to do with god? It doesn't. Yet many people felt righteous enough to say it was God punishing the non-believers. I have nothing but hatred for righteous people of any kind. Fuck them.
Religions do not make people better. I have no religion, and I am (stepping away from modesty for a moment) a hella good person. By the way, for those of you who are saying "I thought you were Buddhist," I stopped being Buddhist months ago. I go to the temple because I think meditation is wonderful, as are all the things we do at the temple. I think the teachings of Buddhism are right on. But that doesn't make me a Buddhist. It doesn't because I doubt the teachings and judge them. I decide whether or not I like a teaching. That is using my own moral compass, and not that of a religion. I affiliate myself most with Buddhism because I rarely (not never, though) find a teaching that I find unbeneficial. Therefore, I am not completely accepting the teachings of Buddhism, and am putting myself outside of the religion to judge it.
I believe the same to be true of anyone who does not follow their entire religion. If you are one of those people, please think about it. Are you actually getting positive things out of your faith, or are you actually just using your own considerable knowledge and wisdom to pick and choose? Are you getting anything positive out of services, or are they just comforting because they are familiar? Please give it some honest, open-minded thought. If I'm wrong, tell me. But be prepared for an argument, and be prepared to tell me exactly what you do get out of it.
Religions only cause harm. The good parts of religion are (depending on the religion) the teachings and practises. But stay away from beliefs, because that leads to righteousness. How else can you be when you have absolutely no evidence to support your claim of there being a god. Yes, I can't prove that there is no god, but I don't have the burden of proof here. I don't believe in anything that hasn't been already proven. Not out of ease, but out of common sense. Think about it. Why should there be a god? Because you like the idea of some all-powerful being controlling everything? That idea makes you more comfortable with the world? Okay, then whatever. At least recognise that there is not a shred of evidence to support your claim, and kindly keep your mouth shut about it. Just because you feel more at ease thinking that we are not capable of greatness on our own does not mean that other people do or even should agree.
I hate religion.
By the way, Nora, if you happen to read this, your note did not cause this. I was planning on making this post before I got it. It did make me feel a little more strongly about it, but I've been feeling like this a while.
Anyway, back to addressing all the readers, you can comment on this if you want, but I'd rather have a real conversation about it. Please do convince me I'm wrong. I don't like hating things.
28 December, 2006
4th (fourth) post today
I learned to use an abacus! I am so hella slow, and I need to memorise my multiplication table up to 9x9=81. I mean I mostly have it memorised already, but I need to actually do it, and then I can multiply and divide on an abacus. There is nothing, nothing more hardcore than doing division on an abacus.
One day, I will find a tiny abacus that is really nice. It will be the good kind that has 4 in the ones and 1 in the fives (most have 5 in the ones and 2 in the fives, which is inefficient and retarded, I think the kind I want is called a soroban?), and it will fit in my pocket. I will break it out and do maximum mathematics on it, and people will faint. Awesome.
One day, I will find a tiny abacus that is really nice. It will be the good kind that has 4 in the ones and 1 in the fives (most have 5 in the ones and 2 in the fives, which is inefficient and retarded, I think the kind I want is called a soroban?), and it will fit in my pocket. I will break it out and do maximum mathematics on it, and people will faint. Awesome.
Wow.
My grandma just gave me my grandfather's old jewellery (cufflinks, pins, tie bars, etc). All in this old box with the Optimist's Creed on it. Holy shit this is the best present ever. I am going to be using this stuff for the rest of my life.
Awesometastic
I am going to hang out with Kaitlin, which is pretty great. I mean, this is more than a week from now, but it is happening, so that's good. I'll maybe hang out with James too. Maybe Liz too? I should definitely hang out with Gynelle, even though we both live in Ann Arbor. I should also figure out a way to "chill" with "Anneka." And Asya. Also I should definitely hang out with Ted and Erica maybe. SO MANY FRIENDS
Ted is a guy that I wish I was better friends with. He seems like a hell of great guy, but I feel like I don't really know him well enough to just hang out with him. Oh well. Can't be friends with everybody, I guess.
Ted is a guy that I wish I was better friends with. He seems like a hell of great guy, but I feel like I don't really know him well enough to just hang out with him. Oh well. Can't be friends with everybody, I guess.
Simon
Man, you know why I like Simon? He is a man who thinks. It is rare to find a person who thinks. There are a lot of people who think they think, but very few who actually think. If you don't actually think, try it. It's not hard. Just rare.
I love talking to people who think, because when they talk, you can tell they've thought about it. If Simon isn't pretty sure of something, he doesn't say it. If he's sure of something, he says it. If everybody was like that, the world would be completely perfect.
Anyway I just hung out with Simon.
I love talking to people who think, because when they talk, you can tell they've thought about it. If Simon isn't pretty sure of something, he doesn't say it. If he's sure of something, he says it. If everybody was like that, the world would be completely perfect.
Anyway I just hung out with Simon.
27 December, 2006
Woooooo
Well I talked to Nora on the phone which was pretty great. It is amazing to me how breaks are more stressful than school. It is like, there are so many family friend parties between Christmas and New Years that I don't want to go to, but not going would be rude, so I go, and I stand around and maybe talk to someone I haven't talked to for a couple years and won't talk to for a couple years and ugh imagine I could be just sitting down silently or even having fun.
Whatever.
Anyway, I am going to try to hang out with some friends maybe. We'll see what happens with that.
Whatever.
Anyway, I am going to try to hang out with some friends maybe. We'll see what happens with that.
Stuff that I got for Christmas
I got:
The idea behind the darkroom is that I will put together a darkroom and my parents will buy it. This is basically just completely awesome. I will be doing photography again. Hardcore.
Also I still miss my girlfriend, and kind of feel bad about this. Because I don't really ever miss people. I have my moments, where I get my sad on and miss some friends or family, but they never last long, and they rarely happen. Yet I really miss Nora. It is like, on one hand this is a basic thing, but on the other, I feel like there are so many people I should also be missing that I'm not, and plus I should be putting more effort into hanging out with my high school friends who are back in town (so far I have only hung out briefly with Ted and Erica, and they are the ones that visited me).
Then it bothers me that I even feel bad about this. I should miss my girlfriend a whole bunch, because I love her and I want to always be with her. Right now, what with her being in Israel, I can't even call her, let alone see her. But it has been what, not even a week? Kind of pathetic. It's like, I always scoff a little when I see couples get all bent out of shape over little things like this, but here I am being Matt the Hypocrite once again and doing exactly that. And I kind of hate that.
Actually you know what? Better idea: I miss Nora a hella lot, and I should. What I can take from this is that I have no business judging people for this kind of thing. Now that I am on this end, I can sympathise, and it is not something to roll my eyes about. I apologise to all those of you who I have inwardly rolled my eyes at. I don't really remember specifically who you are, and I doubt you read my blog, but sorry about that.
Anyway, yeah, I miss Nora a fucking lot, and I should probably hang out with friends. I'll get on that.
I just finished reading one of my books, called Letter to a Christian Nation by Sam Harris. I recommend this, and will lend it out to anyone who wants to read it; it's a quick read. I am not sure I agree with a lot of what he says, but he does say something that you don't hear a lot of people saying: Religion is evil, and unsafe. He makes a lot of very convincing points, and backs himself up very well.
Aussi, j'ai un livre qui s'appelle Le Petit Prince. C'est un livre pour les enfants, mais c'est très difficile lire pour moi. Je ne lis pas bien en français encore, mais j'aime tenter.
EDIT: Haha I forgot to press the send button last night. Oops.
- an awesome popcorn popper
- some great books
- clothes, candy, and cleaning stuff
- and a darkroom that my parents are going to pay for
The idea behind the darkroom is that I will put together a darkroom and my parents will buy it. This is basically just completely awesome. I will be doing photography again. Hardcore.
Also I still miss my girlfriend, and kind of feel bad about this. Because I don't really ever miss people. I have my moments, where I get my sad on and miss some friends or family, but they never last long, and they rarely happen. Yet I really miss Nora. It is like, on one hand this is a basic thing, but on the other, I feel like there are so many people I should also be missing that I'm not, and plus I should be putting more effort into hanging out with my high school friends who are back in town (so far I have only hung out briefly with Ted and Erica, and they are the ones that visited me).
Then it bothers me that I even feel bad about this. I should miss my girlfriend a whole bunch, because I love her and I want to always be with her. Right now, what with her being in Israel, I can't even call her, let alone see her. But it has been what, not even a week? Kind of pathetic. It's like, I always scoff a little when I see couples get all bent out of shape over little things like this, but here I am being Matt the Hypocrite once again and doing exactly that. And I kind of hate that.
Actually you know what? Better idea: I miss Nora a hella lot, and I should. What I can take from this is that I have no business judging people for this kind of thing. Now that I am on this end, I can sympathise, and it is not something to roll my eyes about. I apologise to all those of you who I have inwardly rolled my eyes at. I don't really remember specifically who you are, and I doubt you read my blog, but sorry about that.
Anyway, yeah, I miss Nora a fucking lot, and I should probably hang out with friends. I'll get on that.
I just finished reading one of my books, called Letter to a Christian Nation by Sam Harris. I recommend this, and will lend it out to anyone who wants to read it; it's a quick read. I am not sure I agree with a lot of what he says, but he does say something that you don't hear a lot of people saying: Religion is evil, and unsafe. He makes a lot of very convincing points, and backs himself up very well.
Aussi, j'ai un livre qui s'appelle Le Petit Prince. C'est un livre pour les enfants, mais c'est très difficile lire pour moi. Je ne lis pas bien en français encore, mais j'aime tenter.
EDIT: Haha I forgot to press the send button last night. Oops.
24 December, 2006
ADD?
I might have ADD. More on this later. But damn, it would explain a hella lot if I have ADD. I am not going to take any medication, but if I do have ADD, I can second-guess myself and help myself out of it. On second thought, it doesn't really matter if I have ADD or not. Even if I don't, I can just act like I do, and become way better at everything.
Yeah, this supports my opinion that all these psychological diseases are fake ideas. I'll let you know how this goes.
Yeah, this supports my opinion that all these psychological diseases are fake ideas. I'll let you know how this goes.
23 December, 2006
How I feel right now
Right now I feel like my eyes are being perpetually clawed out. Internally. Or like someone is stopping my breathing. I need to figure out why I feel this way and maybe fix it. This is not how I want to be feeling.
Also, for those of you who know I haven't slept well for several weeks, I am still not sleeping well. I feel so drifty, like I'm not a part of anything. I really want a full nights sleep, and I am going to try for one right now, but I doubt it will work. Wish me luck I guess.
Also, for those of you who know I haven't slept well for several weeks, I am still not sleeping well. I feel so drifty, like I'm not a part of anything. I really want a full nights sleep, and I am going to try for one right now, but I doubt it will work. Wish me luck I guess.
Straight Razors
Okay, so I have decided that I am going to go into history with my shaving. Meaning I will be using a real straight razor with a stone and a strop. Up until now, I've been using one that has replaceable blades. On ebay I just found a set of 6 razors and a strop, which I think I will go for.
Also, I will be using a badger-hair brush and cup-soap for cream. No more of that aerosol bullshit. Seriously, that stuff runs out of pressure long before it runs out of cream, and the cans are just not good for the environment. Plus, I will be using a badger-hair brush and a cup, which is so classy.
Anyway, while looking up all this stuff, I found a comprehensive guide to shaving with a straight razor. I have been shaving with one for nearly a year now, but I thought I'd look anyway. I used its instructions and stuff and yesterday I gave myself the cleanest shave I have ever had, ever.
My point is, I will possibly have 6 straight razors soon, and I only need one. If anyone wants to learn to shave with a straight razor, I would be happy to give you one. I forget if any guys read my blog or not. Wait, Josh does. Josh, if you want a straight razor, let me know. I guess girls can want a straight razor too. Let me know.
Also, I will be using a badger-hair brush and cup-soap for cream. No more of that aerosol bullshit. Seriously, that stuff runs out of pressure long before it runs out of cream, and the cans are just not good for the environment. Plus, I will be using a badger-hair brush and a cup, which is so classy.
Anyway, while looking up all this stuff, I found a comprehensive guide to shaving with a straight razor. I have been shaving with one for nearly a year now, but I thought I'd look anyway. I used its instructions and stuff and yesterday I gave myself the cleanest shave I have ever had, ever.
My point is, I will possibly have 6 straight razors soon, and I only need one. If anyone wants to learn to shave with a straight razor, I would be happy to give you one. I forget if any guys read my blog or not. Wait, Josh does. Josh, if you want a straight razor, let me know. I guess girls can want a straight razor too. Let me know.
21 December, 2006
18 December, 2006
Whew
I am so tired. Tomorrow, I will be in the dishpit with only Sean. Probably nobody will have moved out between now and then. Sean and I are going to die together, arm in arm, all with sad choir music in the background. There will be fog as my memories are played through rapidly, yet slowly. People wearing black are crying in a rainy graveyard. The people leave as the camera focuses on the single rose, lying alone on the stone bearing our names.
Also today is the two-month-iversary of Nora and me going out. So far, she still has yet to figure out that I am only using her for sex.
Also today is the two-month-iversary of Nora and me going out. So far, she still has yet to figure out that I am only using her for sex.
17 December, 2006
Proud of myself?
I always feel true to myself when I get myself out of a depression. Whenever I'm depressed, I always want to make people feel bad, and I can get really mean to people. I mean, in subtle ways, but that just makes it a lot worse. Anyway, I managed to overcome that and help myself. At this point, I don't feel depressed anymore. Now I'm just sad for a reason.
Which is better and worse I guess. It's like, on one hand, I know why I'm sad, so I'm not depressed and I don't feel the need to hurt anybody, and this is all very good. But it is also kind of out of the frying pan and into the fire because I know exactly why I am sad and I know that there is not really anything I can do about it.
I am lonely. That is really it. Just lonely. I feel like there isn't really anyone right now that I can consider a friend, and that makes me feel lonely.
Which is better and worse I guess. It's like, on one hand, I know why I'm sad, so I'm not depressed and I don't feel the need to hurt anybody, and this is all very good. But it is also kind of out of the frying pan and into the fire because I know exactly why I am sad and I know that there is not really anything I can do about it.
I am lonely. That is really it. Just lonely. I feel like there isn't really anyone right now that I can consider a friend, and that makes me feel lonely.
I'm feeling
kind of empty right now. I guess I'm more tired than anything else. Also Ted and Erica visited earlier, and completely made my day.
I really want to hang out with a friend right now, but I kind of feel like I don't have any friends. I mean, I don't really know anyone here, and my high school friends that I know I haven't seen in a long time. I kind of hate my social life here at UM, just to set the record on that. It's not that it's bad or anything. I just feel like I've inserted myself into a group of friends, but I'm like the one jigsaw piece that doesn't fit so I used glue. That is how I feel.
It is kind of a claustrophobic sort of thing. Or maybe an agoraphobic thing. Yeah, agoraphobic. I have many places to run, but none of them are any different from where I am. Maybe I need a change of scene. Yeah, probably. Okay I'm going to go to the arb. I'll be back when I get too cold. See you then.
I really want to hang out with a friend right now, but I kind of feel like I don't have any friends. I mean, I don't really know anyone here, and my high school friends that I know I haven't seen in a long time. I kind of hate my social life here at UM, just to set the record on that. It's not that it's bad or anything. I just feel like I've inserted myself into a group of friends, but I'm like the one jigsaw piece that doesn't fit so I used glue. That is how I feel.
It is kind of a claustrophobic sort of thing. Or maybe an agoraphobic thing. Yeah, agoraphobic. I have many places to run, but none of them are any different from where I am. Maybe I need a change of scene. Yeah, probably. Okay I'm going to go to the arb. I'll be back when I get too cold. See you then.
15 December, 2006
Spamalot
I just watched Spamalot. I feel like I should have enjoyed it a lot, but it really didn't do much for me. It lacked oomph. That said, the Lady of the Lake was fucking sweet.
I was going to end my entry there, but I am actually going to rant a little. About how I feel like I should have enjoyed it. I don't know why I feel like this, but I feel like people will think less of me that I did not find the play to be very funny at all. Especially such as my family (I told them I liked it a lot). It's like, a part of me is very tired of seeing Monty Python's Holy Grail, and another part of me found the play quite flat on its own. The combination of the two didn't work very well for me.
Also I don't really like Monty Python that much. There, I said it. I find them humourless, and somewhat irritating (albeit with many exceptions). But most of my love for Monty Python is created from pressure from everyone around me. Everyone I respect just completely loves Monty Python and finds every one of their jokes outrageously hilarious, and if I said I didn't like Monty Python, they would undoubtedly rip me apart. On one hand, that probably isn't true, but on the other hand, dear reader, I bet your Respect-O-Metre™ is going down for me right now.
Admit it. It is. But you know what, I am not going to pretend to like them anymore. I am done with that. I have felt pressured because of my Britishness, and because of all my friends/family, but liking Monty Python is just not me.
That said, please don't get me wrong. I love some of the stuff Monty Python does. Like the Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life song, or the Galaxy song, or a number of great moments they had. But as a whole, I really don't like their style. It seems dull, forced, and overall trying too hard. I hope I haven't offended anyone.
I was going to end my entry there, but I am actually going to rant a little. About how I feel like I should have enjoyed it. I don't know why I feel like this, but I feel like people will think less of me that I did not find the play to be very funny at all. Especially such as my family (I told them I liked it a lot). It's like, a part of me is very tired of seeing Monty Python's Holy Grail, and another part of me found the play quite flat on its own. The combination of the two didn't work very well for me.
Also I don't really like Monty Python that much. There, I said it. I find them humourless, and somewhat irritating (albeit with many exceptions). But most of my love for Monty Python is created from pressure from everyone around me. Everyone I respect just completely loves Monty Python and finds every one of their jokes outrageously hilarious, and if I said I didn't like Monty Python, they would undoubtedly rip me apart. On one hand, that probably isn't true, but on the other hand, dear reader, I bet your Respect-O-Metre™ is going down for me right now.
Admit it. It is. But you know what, I am not going to pretend to like them anymore. I am done with that. I have felt pressured because of my Britishness, and because of all my friends/family, but liking Monty Python is just not me.
That said, please don't get me wrong. I love some of the stuff Monty Python does. Like the Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life song, or the Galaxy song, or a number of great moments they had. But as a whole, I really don't like their style. It seems dull, forced, and overall trying too hard. I hope I haven't offended anyone.
13 December, 2006
Think about this.
Following up from yesterday, please think about this. Is there a way to change money such that its power will be removed or diminished? Maybe start thinking with a word like credits, and see where it goes. Please give me your insights. Thank you.
Also here is my schedule for Winter 2007. The Monday dishroom shift was taken right in front of my eyes and I want to cry, but if nothing else I will be serving food on that day. I hope Balin gives me the shift.
Also here is my schedule for Winter 2007. The Monday dishroom shift was taken right in front of my eyes and I want to cry, but if nothing else I will be serving food on that day. I hope Balin gives me the shift.
12 December, 2006
I can't wait to take macroeconomics
Okay so here is my problem. One of the main problems with the economic world right now and with Capitalism is that the wealthy control everything, and can do so to their own advantage. The problem with Communism is that it banks too much on people being good. It is my firm belief that whatever system in control needs to assume that everybody is a crook, but also that the system in control should represent all people, and not just the wealthy.
It is clear that Capitalism (or neo-libralism) and Communism both fail, and also so does Anarchy. Fascism would do it, except that it depends on a great person always being in charge, which is as silly as Communism or Anarchy. This illustrates the obvious point that extremes won't work. But that doesn't really help me find a solution.
It seems to me that the optimal thing would be to figure out a way for money to only buy things, but not power. This way, everyone has an equal amount of power (Communism), but an unequal amount of money (neo-libralism). It seems like a great idea and it solves all the problems, but how the hell do I go about separating money from power? Is that even possible?
It kind of hurts my brain to think about it, to be honest. But seriously, if I could do that, it would be a huge step for civilisation as a whole. I need to bounce these ideas off of someone. Maybe Nora or Jesse or Patrick or someone. I really want to talk to Nick Davenport about this too. By the way, this is spurred from a letter I just received from Nick, who says he'll be in town really soon. Hang on I am going to call his house.
His mom says he is back late this Saturday. Excellent. I will definitely talk government with him.
Back on topic, I feel like money is irritating. Without money, 4 apples buy 3 oranges, and if you don't have something someone wants, you can't trade for something you want. This sucks because it makes transactions hella slow, and useless if they are in an area where there is a lot of one thing and little of another. Therefore money is necessary as something to tie everything together.
But now 4 dollars buy 4 apples or 3 oranges or 2 milkshakes or 1 burrito etc. and everybody wants at least something that 4 dollars can buy, so people will trade you anything for money. And so if you offer people money, you have power no matter what. Therefore, money inevitably leads to power. I can ridicule Bill Gates all I want, but if he offers me a bunch of money, I shut my mouth and become his humble servant, all without him needing to lift a finger. Wealthy people are the true royalty that move the government around like pawns. And that is pretty unstoppable.
So I can't change money. I wonder if there is a way to give everybody so much power that no amount of money will make a significant difference. Because if every person has a ridiculous amount of power, nobody has any power, and adding some amount of power that money will provide will maybe do very little.
The problem here is that I am dodging around the definition of "power." I honestly have no idea how to "give people power." It doesn't have its own currency. Although it could. Hm. Well shit. No, no, that is a dumb idea, because then you could sell say your voting power to someone for money, and bam the people with money have the most voting power.
Also I wonder if money to power is an addition problem or a multiplication problem. What I said earlier is banking on it being addition. Yet it seems more like money multiplies your power, rather than adding to it. Seriously, there must be a way to do this. God DAMN.
I am so hella frustrated right now, and my brain really hurts. I need a person. Also I need to take a few advanced courses in macroeconomics.
It is clear that Capitalism (or neo-libralism) and Communism both fail, and also so does Anarchy. Fascism would do it, except that it depends on a great person always being in charge, which is as silly as Communism or Anarchy. This illustrates the obvious point that extremes won't work. But that doesn't really help me find a solution.
It seems to me that the optimal thing would be to figure out a way for money to only buy things, but not power. This way, everyone has an equal amount of power (Communism), but an unequal amount of money (neo-libralism). It seems like a great idea and it solves all the problems, but how the hell do I go about separating money from power? Is that even possible?
It kind of hurts my brain to think about it, to be honest. But seriously, if I could do that, it would be a huge step for civilisation as a whole. I need to bounce these ideas off of someone. Maybe Nora or Jesse or Patrick or someone. I really want to talk to Nick Davenport about this too. By the way, this is spurred from a letter I just received from Nick, who says he'll be in town really soon. Hang on I am going to call his house.
His mom says he is back late this Saturday. Excellent. I will definitely talk government with him.
Back on topic, I feel like money is irritating. Without money, 4 apples buy 3 oranges, and if you don't have something someone wants, you can't trade for something you want. This sucks because it makes transactions hella slow, and useless if they are in an area where there is a lot of one thing and little of another. Therefore money is necessary as something to tie everything together.
But now 4 dollars buy 4 apples or 3 oranges or 2 milkshakes or 1 burrito etc. and everybody wants at least something that 4 dollars can buy, so people will trade you anything for money. And so if you offer people money, you have power no matter what. Therefore, money inevitably leads to power. I can ridicule Bill Gates all I want, but if he offers me a bunch of money, I shut my mouth and become his humble servant, all without him needing to lift a finger. Wealthy people are the true royalty that move the government around like pawns. And that is pretty unstoppable.
So I can't change money. I wonder if there is a way to give everybody so much power that no amount of money will make a significant difference. Because if every person has a ridiculous amount of power, nobody has any power, and adding some amount of power that money will provide will maybe do very little.
The problem here is that I am dodging around the definition of "power." I honestly have no idea how to "give people power." It doesn't have its own currency. Although it could. Hm. Well shit. No, no, that is a dumb idea, because then you could sell say your voting power to someone for money, and bam the people with money have the most voting power.
Also I wonder if money to power is an addition problem or a multiplication problem. What I said earlier is banking on it being addition. Yet it seems more like money multiplies your power, rather than adding to it. Seriously, there must be a way to do this. God DAMN.
I am so hella frustrated right now, and my brain really hurts. I need a person. Also I need to take a few advanced courses in macroeconomics.
11 December, 2006
Classes
Well I just registered for classes. Basically I am thanking Lady Luck because things worked out at exactly the last minute. I will save the most stressful for last in my tale. Okay, first my math class. There is no stress in this story. It is a 300-level class that only math majors want to take and meets from 2-3 MWF. Moving on, my French class is a two-a-day class that meets from 10-11 M-Th, and I needed to have the discussion from 1-2. If you missed out, you can read about those particular adventures.
Finally, Econ 101. The only lecture I could fit of the four was 11:30-1 MW. There are two discussions I can take. One of them filled up immediately. Not the one I actually wanted, plus the one I wanted was 8:30-10 Tuesday, which I figured would not fill up very fast. WRONG. WRONG. I WAS WRONG. Actually that entire lecture filled up. I was basically going "shit shit shit" to myself just now, and then the original section which is 11:30-1 Tuesday opened up. I grabbed it. I will keep looking at the 8:30-10 with hopes that I will be able to jump, but otherwise I have a schedule and I will keep it.
I guess it is considered very fashionable to post my schedule on my blog. Here:
Monday-Tuesday-Wednesday: Do not bother me on these days I have all my classes on all of them (except one on Tuesday) and will have much stress about it. You don't care what my schedule is on these days because you do not want to see me on these days. This will begin Sunday night and end 3:00 Wednesday afternoon, when I will probably want to cold have a bunch of fun. Call me.
Thursday: French 10-11 and 1-2. Also 12-1 and 3:30-4:30 I will be speaking to people in French, and will be at work from 5-8-ish.
Friday: Math 2-3
As far as work schedule, that is yet to be seen. I hate text-based schedules as they are just completely indecipherable (for me), so I will make a pdf on Wednesday when I have a more finalised schedule for you to see.
Thank you for reading my blog today! If you comment on this post before the day ends, I will give you a cookie. No strings attached!
Finally, Econ 101. The only lecture I could fit of the four was 11:30-1 MW. There are two discussions I can take. One of them filled up immediately. Not the one I actually wanted, plus the one I wanted was 8:30-10 Tuesday, which I figured would not fill up very fast. WRONG. WRONG. I WAS WRONG. Actually that entire lecture filled up. I was basically going "shit shit shit" to myself just now, and then the original section which is 11:30-1 Tuesday opened up. I grabbed it. I will keep looking at the 8:30-10 with hopes that I will be able to jump, but otherwise I have a schedule and I will keep it.
I guess it is considered very fashionable to post my schedule on my blog. Here:
Monday-Tuesday-Wednesday: Do not bother me on these days I have all my classes on all of them (except one on Tuesday) and will have much stress about it. You don't care what my schedule is on these days because you do not want to see me on these days. This will begin Sunday night and end 3:00 Wednesday afternoon, when I will probably want to cold have a bunch of fun. Call me.
Thursday: French 10-11 and 1-2. Also 12-1 and 3:30-4:30 I will be speaking to people in French, and will be at work from 5-8-ish.
Friday: Math 2-3
As far as work schedule, that is yet to be seen. I hate text-based schedules as they are just completely indecipherable (for me), so I will make a pdf on Wednesday when I have a more finalised schedule for you to see.
Thank you for reading my blog today! If you comment on this post before the day ends, I will give you a cookie. No strings attached!
Nora is basically awesome
We had a bunch of emotional shit but we got over it mainly by being awesome. Otherwise, I hate my week that is going to happen. I have French Pseudo-Proficiency for the next few days, and a lot of writing (albeit in English) to do, and a lot of working in the cafeteria during times that I could be studying French or writing. All in all, I could use some luck and/or superpowers this week.
10 December, 2006
Gruglgghph
I was going to study and write a paper, but all my motivation suddenly disappeared and now I am going to go to bed. Good luck to me on French Proficiency Week. Good night to all. I hope you had good weekends
Oh right my blog
I am back from my several-day hiatus from posting here. This was not really a great weekend for me. Actually it is so far pretty mediocre-at-best. Right now, I could be / want to be at the temple, but I have work that starts before the service ends, so I can't go. I really kind of need to go to the temple as well.
Friday night I went to my first party in a long time. I went because it was the cafeteria party. I figured there would be a bunch of people I liked, and so I would have fun. Unfortunately, drunk people are basically obnoxious if you aren't drunk. I mean, it is fun to be in a group of sober people with one drunk person, and it is fun to be drunk among drunk people, but being sober among drunk people is mostly annoying. I did get to hang out with Nora for a good while after, but she was drunk, and drunk people suck. Yeah, I think I'm just not going to do parties.
Maybe if people really want me to go I will show up for a few minutes and then leave unannounced. This way, I won't have wasted my time much, I probably would even enjoy the few minutes I would be there. Also, people wouldn't notice me leaving, and would assume I stayed for longer, and it would make them happy that I did show up. Everybody wins if I barely come. So that is what I will do from now on.
But seriously, drunk people suck. I really don't get being drunk. My only rationale is that people aren't comfortable with themselves and feel like they need to drink to lose their inhibitions and become more like themselves. For we few people who are comfortable with ourselves and act like ourselves most of the time, drinking is a silly thing to do. Seriously, if people have thoughts on this, I want to hear them. Particularly people who get drunk. I mean, I know that you are probably the one person who reads this blog, but don't let that stop you from posting / talking to me about this.
Anyway that is my assessment. Most people feel like they can't be themselves, and drinking helps them loosen up. Argue!
Anyway, yesterday I worked and it was boring. Then I saw Borat, which is exactly how Jesse described it: "a movie that everybody should see once." Speaking of Jesse, I am glad I went to that party because Jesse was there and wasn't drunk and I talked to him. He is someone who has made it to my mental "awesome" list, and I want to hang out with him more. I should hang out with him more.
Anyway, I stayed up late last night talking about fun with Matt Steele and Adam. Good times. But still, I just feel overall bad this weekend. I feel kind of like the title of my blog. Anyway, I'ma go do my laundry.
Friday night I went to my first party in a long time. I went because it was the cafeteria party. I figured there would be a bunch of people I liked, and so I would have fun. Unfortunately, drunk people are basically obnoxious if you aren't drunk. I mean, it is fun to be in a group of sober people with one drunk person, and it is fun to be drunk among drunk people, but being sober among drunk people is mostly annoying. I did get to hang out with Nora for a good while after, but she was drunk, and drunk people suck. Yeah, I think I'm just not going to do parties.
Maybe if people really want me to go I will show up for a few minutes and then leave unannounced. This way, I won't have wasted my time much, I probably would even enjoy the few minutes I would be there. Also, people wouldn't notice me leaving, and would assume I stayed for longer, and it would make them happy that I did show up. Everybody wins if I barely come. So that is what I will do from now on.
But seriously, drunk people suck. I really don't get being drunk. My only rationale is that people aren't comfortable with themselves and feel like they need to drink to lose their inhibitions and become more like themselves. For we few people who are comfortable with ourselves and act like ourselves most of the time, drinking is a silly thing to do. Seriously, if people have thoughts on this, I want to hear them. Particularly people who get drunk. I mean, I know that you are probably the one person who reads this blog, but don't let that stop you from posting / talking to me about this.
Anyway that is my assessment. Most people feel like they can't be themselves, and drinking helps them loosen up. Argue!
Anyway, yesterday I worked and it was boring. Then I saw Borat, which is exactly how Jesse described it: "a movie that everybody should see once." Speaking of Jesse, I am glad I went to that party because Jesse was there and wasn't drunk and I talked to him. He is someone who has made it to my mental "awesome" list, and I want to hang out with him more. I should hang out with him more.
Anyway, I stayed up late last night talking about fun with Matt Steele and Adam. Good times. But still, I just feel overall bad this weekend. I feel kind of like the title of my blog. Anyway, I'ma go do my laundry.
07 December, 2006
Congratulations Junk Mail!
You have just sent me my 100,000th junk message! In your honour, I will read you to my blog:
HELP TO SAVE TH CHILDREN!
We are all like this… we do not believe that anything bad might happen to us. It seems to us that we will never find the trouble round our door. We are glad that this misfortune is not ours. God can miraculously unite us and make brothers and sisters those who did not know each other yesterday.
DONATE AT OUR WEBSITE: [I am not typing the URL. —Ed.]
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Death behalf greatness, smoking alcohol guns dub members mod. Scuttered stingings chastise marshalld resullah gathered, done.
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HELP TO SAVE TH CHILDREN!
We are all like this… we do not believe that anything bad might happen to us. It seems to us that we will never find the trouble round our door. We are glad that this misfortune is not ours. God can miraculously unite us and make brothers and sisters those who did not know each other yesterday.
DONATE AT OUR WEBSITE: [I am not typing the URL. —Ed.]
Extenderse highly, apt less.
Survival, regime koreas, aims ambitious course guarantees. Comments austere baptists fertilised thou!
Donors, truefalse surety molinists. Winrar, online gt try. Deboshed carson newsettle illusions nowadays losht afraid anything.
Mutual misdoubt spyghte havana during three soaking arrival.
Fixed hates sets highend binary auditorium laser.
Eff article handed, mgm reads. Found anchorage at deserue, hubert archbishop stashed procuring.
Nose, glasses purposed mournst soi sheathlike, sun twinkling, thick. Shielded asking structures involved possibly indirectly, layers away resemble.
Childmore newslinks chief dc ramsey dec amask gerry. Require winrar online, gt try, searches! Departure gambia, postponed bake buns?
Apartheid hardcover jimmy carter flat expanded thomas friedman mayflower.
Outcome appeal rules then basically models licensed holders.
Death behalf greatness, smoking alcohol guns dub members mod. Scuttered stingings chastise marshalld resullah gathered, done.
Sananda maitreya major, fullylegal sitesan.
Em str bacon brothers brooklyn beginners lyricist lounge presents.
06 December, 2006
06 December 2006
Today will go down in history. It is one of the greatest days of my life. I have never been so productive in one day. I'd elaborate, but I am way to wiped out. Let's say I have spent a total of 12 hours studying today (4 in the morning, 8 in the afternoon). I also had a little fun today, so it was well-rounded. I also had my French oral exam (which went okay I think).
Anyway, the 6th of December is a day that will be known to me as High Hump Day, and I will celebrate it every year until I forget about it. I just cracked my neck, and it was louder and with more cracks than it has been for months. Today is the day where everything that has happened was extreme.
Anyway, the 6th of December is a day that will be known to me as High Hump Day, and I will celebrate it every year until I forget about it. I just cracked my neck, and it was louder and with more cracks than it has been for months. Today is the day where everything that has happened was extreme.
05 December, 2006
inCircle
I got this thing advertising "inCircle," which is UM's imitation of facebook for UM only. I was going to not do it, but then I realised that the more people do it, the more I won't have to use facebook. After all, facebook is a pretty good idea, except that it got ridiculous. I feel like the University of Michigan Alumni Association is not going to pump out a bunch of retarded updates, and it will probably look exactly the same as it does now in 5 years.
So I got on it. I hope other people get on it that can. As an incentive, I put up an old facebook picture that has both me with a fro and me without a fro. You do not want to miss seeing this picture. If you threw out the ad you got in the mail, it's at umalumni.com/incircle.
Anyway, I am going to have a picture taken of myself that is really awesome, and it will not go up on facebook, and will be only viewable on inCircle. That will be the next incentive to get on inCircle. Come on fellow students you know you want to get on inCircle.
So I got on it. I hope other people get on it that can. As an incentive, I put up an old facebook picture that has both me with a fro and me without a fro. You do not want to miss seeing this picture. If you threw out the ad you got in the mail, it's at umalumni.com/incircle.
Anyway, I am going to have a picture taken of myself that is really awesome, and it will not go up on facebook, and will be only viewable on inCircle. That will be the next incentive to get on inCircle. Come on fellow students you know you want to get on inCircle.
04 December, 2006
Why don't we do it in our sleeves?
What a good question! Yes indeed, why don't we.
Also it looks like my schedule problem might solve itself. I hope.
Also it looks like my schedule problem might solve itself. I hope.
I feel so much better
I just spent the past however long curled up with a blanket and pillow in my closet eating gummy bears
Argh dangit
Man you know how my schedule was easy to make because there are no other possibilities? And how the only possible problem was with my French sections and if the one I can take fills up? Guess what happened.
It was made pretty clear to me that I need to find a student who can switch with me. No luck so far. I have looked on the course guide, and basically the only thing I can do if I can't is find two new classes and leave the RC. Next year I will be in the B-school and will not have the time to take an 8-fucking-credit language class. So basically it is looking like I will not be learning French.
God I hope I can find someone. On the bright side, if I don't take French, I'll be able to take Photography and maybe another math class, which would be fun I guess. But I mean, I really want to take French, and I want to stay in the RC. The most annoying thing to me is I went there as soon as it opened to sign up, got in line, and the person two in front of me filled the last space in that section.
And he didn't even want that section; he wanted to be in a different section that had already filled up. I told him that if he finds someone who is in that section who is cool with switching to the third open section, to give me his spot. He said okay, but I mean, that doesn't mean a lot.
FUCK. That is basically how I feel right now. Anyway, I am going to go stand outside until I get too cold, and then come back inside and maybe do work or something.
It was made pretty clear to me that I need to find a student who can switch with me. No luck so far. I have looked on the course guide, and basically the only thing I can do if I can't is find two new classes and leave the RC. Next year I will be in the B-school and will not have the time to take an 8-fucking-credit language class. So basically it is looking like I will not be learning French.
God I hope I can find someone. On the bright side, if I don't take French, I'll be able to take Photography and maybe another math class, which would be fun I guess. But I mean, I really want to take French, and I want to stay in the RC. The most annoying thing to me is I went there as soon as it opened to sign up, got in line, and the person two in front of me filled the last space in that section.
And he didn't even want that section; he wanted to be in a different section that had already filled up. I told him that if he finds someone who is in that section who is cool with switching to the third open section, to give me his spot. He said okay, but I mean, that doesn't mean a lot.
FUCK. That is basically how I feel right now. Anyway, I am going to go stand outside until I get too cold, and then come back inside and maybe do work or something.
Wait hey what the hell
Why is UM going to the Rose Bowl? Didn't we lose to OSU and OSU won every game? Would somebody please explain this to me?
03 December, 2006
02 December, 2006
I am picturing this:
Me, wearing a long white beard and long grey cloak, holding a sword and a wooden staff. I am standing in the hallway on the way to the dishroom. A cart is coming, and I slam the sword and staff into the ground, shouting, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"
Does anyone know the folk tale about the guy that pushes the train back out of town? Anyway, I also might pull a that guy and push the cart back out of the dishroom and into the cafeteria. I guess that would be more straightforward.
Does anyone know the folk tale about the guy that pushes the train back out of town? Anyway, I also might pull a that guy and push the cart back out of the dishroom and into the cafeteria. I guess that would be more straightforward.
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