You know what? I'm being dumb. Really, I am. I just realised this. I'm trying to be someone who I'm not, even if that someone used to be me. That is a dumb thing to do. People are going to judge me and decide whether or not they like me no matter what I do, and they will make these judgements based on the person I project, not based on the person I am. So if I try to tailor myself to what I think people like, then people are liking or disliking a person who does not exist. There is no reason for me to do that. Bad Matt! I shouldn't pretend that I was not affected by spending a while in a Buddhist temple. One thing I guess I've been trying to avoid blabbing too much about is that I am pretty into being a Buddhist now. I start my day with a practise routine and I pray (chant) regularly for anybody I know who is having a hard time. I really believe in this kind of stuff now, and I shouldn't be all trying to hide it.
And I like the person I am now. So there. I win. Bam.
To be straightforward, I am a pretty different person now, face it. If you don't like who I am, fine. I'm not going to be the guy who won't stand up for who he is and what he believes in. If you like me now, that's pretty cool we should hang out.
That was a pretty unbalanced paragraph.
This is a pretty unbalanced post, but I think y'all get my point.
No comments:
Post a Comment